Honor Your Wife

October 22 – on this day, Terry and I were united as husband and wife.  After 45 years together, she got to go to Heaven, where God prepares a place for us.  As I reflect on our marriage, I have so many awesome, warm memories of our time together.  And, I look forward to that day when we can be reunited as co-heirs in God’s kingdom.   The following is a testimony to our marriage and time together on this earth.

“… you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7

When I first told my dad that Terry and I were engaged, he said, “Son, I will only give you one word of advice; Keep her happy”.

As Terry and I traveled the journey of our marriage for 45 years, these words stuck to me and were never far from my thoughts. During our early years, when we were first getting to know each other, and during the latter years when she was ill; there was not a time in our life that these words did not come out of the recesses of my memory and reminded me of what I must do for her.

Yes, there were rocky times. Yet, even in those rocky times, after I had a time to reflect on what I was contributing, these words came back to me. I believe that these words, “Keep her happy” formed the bedrock of a foundation that lasted from the beginning, and even to today.

During our first year of marriage, she received roses every month. One for the first month, two for the second, three for the third …

As we did things, we did them together, as a couple. I was the active one, and liked to hike, ski, ride motorcycles, and enjoy the active times. She didn’t, but she did them with me. After awhile, these activities waned from our lives so that I could take care of her.

As she progressed down the path of her disease, I did everything I could to take care of her. At first, it meant working a full time job and being a full time care giver. God blessed me last year in providing enough for me that when I was laid off from work I could take care of her full time.

Since she passed, I have tried my best to honor her in many ways. If nothing else, so that I can repay all that she has done for me. To this day, I work to find more ways to honor her.

Today, I still honor her and one of the ways is for me to do that is to move forward in life. She is forever on my heart. Her influence will always be embedded on my soul. So, in a way, we live on together; even in her passing.

I know she is in Heaven, and with Our Lord. My desire, my goal, is to finish whatever is before me with dignity, love, and to be able to say to her, “I love you”; with the same honor we have had for all this time.

Terry made me a better person. I cannot even imagine who or what I would be today, were it not for her.

Terry’s Memorial at our home